The Captain's (B)log

Archive for the tag “Relationship”

Is Chivalry Dead?

1600’s: Oh Dearest Romeo, I write to inform you that I have received your letter and I’ve been left quite speechless.

2011: K

Call me old-fashioned but I’m the kind of guy that will open doors for women (not just the one’s I think are pretty) and always pay no matter how they insist. I aspire to be that knight in shining armor… with a slightly bad ass side as well 😉
This doesn’t mean I don’t like to do crazy, (sometimes… well most of the time) illegal things. I have two tattoos and I’m planning on getting more. What chivalry means is a respect for women in general, and, while I’m nowhere near perfect, I try. I was raised in a strict environment and have branched out immensely while on my own but a few of these basic principles have served me well over the years.

Those whose ‘game’ is based on the misconception they’re flirting with women while putting them down and treating them with disrespect are nothing but insecure.

I myself think ladies with a mindset like this one (directly below) are entirely unattractive. I blame this on men without a doubt. We have forced them to fill our roles in addition to theirs  while we watch our sports,  live off our welfare and generally abdicate what little responsibility we have left. A true man deserves a true woman. There are few left. I believe nothing is more attractive than a  girly, feminine girl who desires to fill the void in society that only she can.

^^^See? Even these felines have it right ^^^

Chivalry is not dead, it’s just gone into hiding. With the emergence of hardened, assertive women who construe certain gestures of common courtesy as a sign of weakness and degradation, gentlemen have to be careful of who they hold that door open for.

The few that persist in the practice of chivalry are soon burnt out by the disdain of the opposite sex. Women are confused, not knowing whether to construe an open door or pulled out chair as someone trying to get in their pants or else mockery. This can be directly linked to a worldwide absence of true men with chivalrous intentions.

Man or woman… ask yourself: is it so hard to believe in a tradition built on mutual respect and courteous behavior?


I Speak Fluent Foodish

When questioning certain females as to the nature of their virtually non-existent eating habits, it quickly became evident that this was way out of my league… so naturally I took it and ran with it. I was informed that this is not a simple issue, with large words people don’t usually understand like ‘metabolism’ and ‘food‘. They couldn’t have known I have a second language. I speak fluent Foodish.

These girls are all “Oh yes I had this crumb for breakfast. Oh so delicious! And then the speck I picked off my plate for lunch? Mmm… scrumptious and that DINNER! OMG, words can’t describe how good that 1/32 of cake tasted!” Aspiring models reading Vogue Magazine and bragging about how little they ate… Really? First of all, that’s very dangerous. Everyone knows the leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.

NEWSFLASH: There’s a line in the sand between taking care of yourself and starvation. One stick figure of a friend actually gave this retort when questioned. “Well, there’s starving kids in Africa.” From personal experience, this statement will suffice as an answer for most questions on any subject… you should try it sometime! However, in THIS instance it was completely off topic. At least try to give me a slightly entertaining answer like “I’m trying to minimize my body mass so the aliens will have a harder time spotting me from space.”

Now, realistically, I can’t speak for all my sex (keep reading…) but I will do my best. I don’t claim to be a relationship expert but in the process of devastating the obvious I find it my duty to the blogosphere to give it my best shot. What man wants to hang around someone who pukes at the mention of food? That rules out like… half of our conversation topics and seeing how much you all like to talk, that’s mutually painful.

A walking coat hanger ready to faint never did anyone any good. Everyone wants to get SOMETHING out of life whether it be helping others, having fun, leaving a legacy etc (email me if you don’t want to get something out of life, you have issues). What we DO want is a real, live human being who doesn’t have to pursue their twisted view of ‘perfect’ all the time. We don’t want to have to look through a telescope to see your personality up close and personal. At the same time, we shouldn’t have to use a microscope to verify your waistline still exists.

My point isn’t as barbaric as “guys like curves”. It’s not about being the perfect model or a sex symbol. If you have to starve something, starve the ego. No one wants or needs a victim of self-image obsession, male, female, skinny or otherwise. I realize I’m targeting a select group of people with this post but it’s because there’s a very conscious choice involved. I hope that this article’s perspective has shed some new light on the subject. If so, this gentleman has accomplished his goal.

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