The Captain's (B)log

Archive for the tag “Nigeria”

Money Matters


“Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work.” –Robert Orben

I’ve ran into some hard times lately… more or less. I have a job I could travel to and make a lot of money quick but, due to social and romantically involved reasons, I have chosen not to do so. I was thinking today about the pros and cons of possessing large amounts of money. As a twist on my previous and short lived episode “Monday Musings of a Mental Millionaire” I decided to write down a few (feel free to add more sensible ones to the list):

Pro: Fat wallets make you feel good about yourself.
Con: Thin wallets are more comfortable to sit on.

 
Pro: You can buy useless things like an island complete with midgets painted orange to be oompa loompas or a cruise ship in the shape of a sandwich. You could buy all the algebra books in the world then rent a blimp and dump it on Topeka, Kansas as an act of math instruction.
Cons: Oompa loompas are gay. You can’t eat cruise ships so what’s the point? And last but not least… Topeka? Really? Be more philanthropic why don’t you. Try Nigeria or some third world country where they can use it as firestarter.

Pro: You’d get all the easy girls (or whatever gender seems to match your sexual orientation). People would think you’re important.
Con: I am not attracted to easy girls in the least and if they’re just attracted to the dinero? They can saddle up and ride away. As for being important, if you think nobody cares about poor people, try missing a couple of car payments.

Pro: You’d have security and the ability to enjoy life in a more stress free environment.
Con: Money can’t buy happiness… but it sure makes misery easier to live with! 😛

Pro: So many opportunities to capitalize on!
Con: Scams. Frauds. What if someone offered you a team franchise in the Nigerian Chimpanzee Archery Association (NCAA)? Like… how could you say no to that?

That concludes my short list. Feel free to add to it BUT you must have both a pro AND a con to suggest any additions to the list 😉

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