The Facebook Equation*
© Captain Obvious
*Despite the ominous title, little to no math skills are required in the reading of this post.
With over 500 million active users spending 700 billion minutes per month on Facebook, it’s a safe bet that, if you’re reading this, you have a Facebook account. I would like to open the discussion with a passage out of Facebook. I hope this verse, originally composed by my close friend (who has shared custody of my middle name) Kenny V. Anderson, will give us some insight into the modern transcendence of social networking.
The 23rd Facebook
The Facebook is my shepherd, I shall not poke.
It maketh me to lie down with my smart phone
It leadeth me beside the computer, it restoreth my old friendships.
It leadeth me in the paths of comments, for my ego’s sake
Yea, though I scroll through the valley of misspelling,
I will fear no grammar, for emoticons are with me.
Your likes and your comments, they comfort me.
Thou preparest an event before me in the presence of my newsfeed.
Thou anointeth my wall with statuses, my suggestions runneth over.
Surely friends and strangers shall follow me all the days of my life.
I will dwell on the wall of my profile forever. lol.
As the title suggests, my topic today specifically relates to the adding and deleting of friends, mainly, the thought process, internal questions and deciding factors applicable to linking yourself with another human being in the universe. We live in a world where a deletion on Facebook can serve as an end to a real life friendship. An oversight such as not changing your single status on Facebook can lead to the demise of a relationship (on the Relationship Don’ts List it goes #1 Cheating… #2 Not updating your relationship status).
We’ve all asked ourselves the question (especially regarding people we haven’t ACTUALLY met), whether for a fleeting instant or what seems like an eternity… should I add this person? Many factors come into play at this point. Do I want to be associated with this person? Will they like my status posts? Will Bob get mad if I add Bill? But do they like macaroni and cheese?
We need to face both reality and the music (but mostly reality because we already KNOW music is intrinsically awesome). It comes down to our image, our freedom from other people’s opinions and our personal definition of the word friend. C’mon people, don’t be Jack Black from Shallow Hal, say yes to friendship and the unexplored world of a new individual being a part of your life! That’s the way to win friends and influence people but… whatever you do… make sure you know WHY you do it. If you didn’t get anything else out of this post I hope you got that. If you’re self aware no one can stop you, whether in the social or business world, Friday night bowling or spelunking off the coast of South America. Follow your dreams.
In conclusion, the conclusion is obvious. Know why you do what you do and you will be able to repeat what works and weed out that which has set you back. Expand that circle of influence. This starts in our minds and in our virtual world, social networking.
Well, there’s 5 minutes and 32 seconds of your life that you’ll never get back.